Lesson 2: Examples and script!
| Hello friend! Let's be honest. Your child WILL:
These are the very simple strategies that work wonders in creating momentum and getting the good going. Strategy #1: Stay curious and open minded. Your kids have good ideas too, and the way that they are experiencing the world matters. So before you jump in with an agenda, LISTEN. Ask questions. Seek to understand. It builds trust and loyalty. This sounds like: "Tell me more about why you feel that way." "How can I help here?" "I believe you." Strategy #2: Give a high probability request. Help your kiddo get into their "yes brain" by asking them to do something that is an easier YES! Begin with something that they want to do, in order to get them to do what you want them to do. You can do this by:
This can sound like: "What music do you want to play while we clean up?" "I have a special delivery of laundry that needs to be mailed to the bedroom on the left!" "What kind of snack do you want while you do your homework?" Strategy #3: Use positive consequences. A behavioral science truth: Behavior moves towards things that are positive. I know, it feels easier and faster to give threats. BUT positive consequences not only build momentum, but also a brain that actually enjoys doing what is right. It sounds like: "As soon as you're done, what fun thing would you like to do?" "Let's hop in the car and you can play with the window button for the first 2 minutes." "As long as you make wise decisions with the phone you are borrowing, you get the privilege of using it as a tool to help you." Click on the button below for a free printable on even more script on how to use positive consequences. It's super helpful.
Strategy #4: Calmly get back on track. If you have held up a wise boundary and a child pushes back, the key is to STAY CALM. Testing boundaries is simply DEVELOPMENTAL. It's not personal. A child needs to learn from your example how to respond when emotions are high. Here are some powerful words you can calmly say to get back on track. It sounds like: "I'm sorry you feel that way, nevertheless I still need you to _____" "You don't want to leave, and it's time to go." "It makes sense that you are mad. I know you'll do better next time." Congratulations! You finished my free course The Secret To Ending Power Struggles. Tomorrow, to give you a huge thank you for doing the work to make your home a safe place, I'll be sending you a free gift—a printable of my most popular quote. Stay safe my friend, |
Comments
Post a Comment